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September 4, 2014

I Am a Teacher.

In times when you are judged by the company you work for, the position you hold, the number of people who report to you and by the money you make, I am a misfit.

I am a Teacher. Yes only a teacher.

I have never earned enough from this job to be able to run my home or had the benefits that come with a corporate job. I have also been told ‘ You could have been successful in a nine-to-five job, what a waste of your talent’, ‘Teaching, oh that’s an easy job with not much to do’, ‘How could you spend so much time in a class full of kids’ and many other things.

I could have continued working in advertising or the hospitality industry, where I worked earlier in my career and made more money and name but a quick turn of events landed me in a classroom of fifty six year old kids.

My first day was a disaster! A student fell down and got injured and I forgot to check on him. The students were smart and naughty enough to sense my discomfort and won’t be quiet. It seemed impossible to reach out to all fifty of them at once. By the end of the day with hoarse throat, swollen feet I was ready to quit. But I went back. And back again. And spent the last 22 years with schools and children of various age groups across many cities in various capacities.

 In India, unlike in many other countries where teachers are not given their due when people in top jobs/positions understate the work I do, I look up and say ‘Hey how many of your colleagues from two decades ago remember you?’
‘Have you ever experienced the joy of being introduced to person’s family as one of the biggest influences on them?’
‘Has anyone ever told you that what they are today is because of you?’
‘Has your work shaped minds and hearts together?’
‘How often have you been invited to major life events of people you haven’t met in almost last fifteen years?’
‘Is their role multifaceted enough to include being a resource provider, curriculum specialist, organizer, assessor, learning facilitator, participant, mentor, catalyst for change all at the same time?’



I thank each and every student of mine for making me stronger, forcing me to strive harder in class, to constantly update my skills, encouraging me to try and do new things in class and forming a strong bond for life which goes much beyond the clichéd student-teacher relationship.





June 1, 2014

Are you stressed?

Some Symptoms of Stress


Feelings(Emotional)
Thoughts (Cognitive)
Physical Symptoms
Behaviours
  • Anxiety
  • Irritability
  • Fear
  • Moodiness
  • Embarrassment
  • Jumpy
  • Depressed
  • Hostile/Angry
  • Frustrated
  • Self-criticism
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Difficulty in making decisions
  • Forgetfulness
  • Mental disorganization
  • Preoccupation with the future ("what if...")
  • Repetitive Thoughts
  • Fear of Failure
  • Tight muscles
  • Cold or sweaty hands
  • Headaches
  • Back of neck tension
  • Tense shoulders
  • Sleep disturbance
  • Stomach distress
  • More colds and infections
  • Fatigue
  • Rapid breathing
  • Pounding heart
  • Trembling
  • Dry mouth
  • Sore or tired eyes
  • Heart or chest pain
  • Oily skin; acne
  • Butterflies in stomach
  • Stuttering
  • Other speaking difficulties
  • Crying
  • Acting impulsively
  • Nervous laughter
  • "Snapping" at others
  • Teeth grinding
  • Jaw clenching
  • Increased smoking
  • Alcohol or drug use
  • Being prone to more accidents
  • Increased appetite
  • Decreased appetite
  • Frequent urination

(If you tick your own reactions, you can get an idea of your personal responses to stress. This can help you recognise signs of stress coming on, in the future.)

February 8, 2014

Jagjit Singh, you will always be on my Playlist… (part II)

He is the only one for whom I have shown unashamed ‘fan-giri’. After a concert much to the amusement and embarrassment of my husband and friends I sneaked into the green room ducking through the security to talk to him. To listen to and be mesmerized by his voice in person. Hesitatingly I stood behind a few people who had surrounded him for autographs. I awaited my turn. And then in a flash rest of the people were gone and it was my turn. He looked directly and asked – aur aap ke liye? I mumbled something like how I am so fond of his songs. He smiled and before he could move away, I pressed the ticket in his hands. He wrote on it and said thank you to everyone and left. I clung on to the paper like it was some prize winning lottery ticket. 

He is the only one whose autograph I have ever taken. On a little piece of paper that I have kept safely. Because I also know that he is never going to give another autograph.

The next and the last time I saw him in person was at an opening of an Art Gallery. This time we spoke for a bit. A kind photographer at the event captured the moment for eternity.


I have often thought as to why I feel so connected to him.
He did not know me. But in my mind and heart he is one person who knew me very well. He has been there when I have needed to listen to his soothing voice after feeling like down in the dumps. The words he sang seemed to have been written only for me when I have sometimes let the tears roll down my face. He has been a background companion when we have spent many lovely evenings with friends. It is his voice that accompanies me on my countless drives between cities. Much to the surprise of many people I have his songs on my ‘run list’ too   He has shared my moods like a close friend or confidante.

(I am sharing a few of his ghazals which are close to my heart)

ये जो जिंदगी की किताब हैं, ये किताब भी क्या किताब हैं
कही एक हसीन सा ख्वाब हैं, कही जानलेवा अज़ाब हैं

कही छाँव हैं कही धुप हैं कही और ही कोई रूप हैं
कई चेहरे इसमें छुपे हुये, एक अजीब सी ये नकाब हैं

कही खो दिया कही पा लिया, कही रो लिया कही गा लिया
कही छीन लेती हैं हर खुशी, कही मेहरबान बेहिसाब हैं

कही आसुओं की हैं दास्तान, कही मुस्कुराहटों का बयां
कही बरकतों की हैं बारिशें, कही तिश्नगी बेहिसाब हैं

______________________________________

कभी-कभी यूँ भी हमने अपने जी को बहलाया है,
जिन बातों को खुद नहीं समझे, औरों को समझाया है,

हमसे पूछो इज्ज़तवालों की इज्ज़त का हाल यहाँ,
हमने भी इस शहर में रहकर थोड़ा नाम कमाया है,

उससे बिछड़े बरसों बीते, लेकिन आज ना जाने क्यूँ?
आँगन में हँसते बच्चों को बेकार धमकाया है,

कोई मिला तो हाथ मिलाया, कहीं गए तो बातें की,
घर से बाहर जब भी निकले, दिन भर बोझ उठाया है.

___________________________________________

शायद मैं जिंदगी की सहर ले के गया
क़ातिल को आज अपने ही घर ले के गया
ता उम्र ढूँढता रहा मंज़िल मैं इश्क की
अंजाम ये के गर्द--सफर ले के गया
नश्तर है मेरे हाथ में कांधों पे मैकदा
लो मैं इलाज--दर्द--जिगर ले के गया
'फाकिर' सनम मैकदे में आता मैं लौटकर
इक ज़ख्म भर गया था इधर ले के गया
 ___________________________________________

मैं भूल जाऊं तुम्हे, अब यही मुनासिब है
मगर भूलाना भी चाहूँ तो किस तरह भूलूँ
कि तुम तो फ़िर भी हकीक़त हो कोई ख्वाब नहीं
यहाँ तो दिल का ये आलम है क्या कहूँ
"कमबख्त" भुला सका ना ये वो सिलसिला जो था ही नहीं
वो इक ख्याल जो आवाज़ तक गया ही नहीं
वो एक बात जो मैं कह नहीं सका तुमसे
वो एक रब्त जो हम में कभी रहा ही नहीं
मुझे है याद वो सब जो कभी हुआ ही नहीं
अगर ये हाल है दिल का तो कोई समझाए
तुम्हें भुलाना भी चाहूँ तो किस तरह भूलूँ कि तुम तो फ़िर भी हकीक़त हो कोई ख्वाब नहीं
____________________________________

वो दिल ही क्या तेरे मिलने की जो दुआ ना करे,
मैं तुझको भूल के जिंदा रहूँ, खुदा ना करे.

रहेगा साथ तेरा प्यार ज़िन्दगी बनकर,
ये और बात, मेरी ज़िन्दगी वफ़ा ना करे.

सुना है उसको मुहब्बत दुआए देती है,
जो दिल पे चोट खाए मगर गिला ना करे.

ये ठीक है नहीं मरता कोई जुदाई में,
खुदा किसी को किसी से मगर जुदा ना करे.

खुदा किसी को किसी पर फ़िदा ना करे,
अगर करे तो क़यामत तलक जुदा ना करे.

_______________________________________

मैंने दिल से कहा, दीवाने बता
जब से कोई मिला, तू है खोया हुआ,
ये कहानी है क्या, है ये क्या सिलसिला, दीवाने बता
मैंने दिल से कहा, दीवाने बता
धडकनों में छुपी, कैसी आवाज़ है
कैसा ये गीत है कैसा ये साज़ है,
कैसी ये बात है, कैसा ये राज़ है, दीवाने बता
मेरे दिल ने कहा, जब से कोई मिला
चाँद तारे फिजां, फूल भंवरे हवा
ये हसीं वादियाँ, नीला ये आसमान
सब है जैसे नया, मेरे दिल ने कहा
मैंने दिल से कहा, मुझको ये तो बता,
जो है तुझको मिला, उसमे क्या बात है
क्या है जादूगरी, कौन है वो परी, दीवाने बता
ना वो कोई परी, ना कोई महजबीं
ना वो दुनिया में सबसे है ज्यादा हसीं,
भोलीभाली-सी है, सीधी साधी-सी है,
लेकिन उसमे अदा एक निराली सी है
उसके बिन मेरा जीना ही बेकार है,
मैंने दिल से कहा, बात इतनी सी है,
कि तुझे प्यार है,
मेरे दिल ने कहा मुझको इकरार है,
हाँ मुझे प्यार है.

Jagjit Singh, you will always be on my Playlist…